Next generation doctor

One day, Pete complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts. I guess

I

should see a doctor." His friend said, "Don't do that. There's a

computer at

the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a

doctor.

Simply put in a sample of your urine, and the computer will diagnose

your

problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10.00."

Pete figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine

sample

and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the

sample

and

deposited the $10.00. The computer started making some noise and various

lights started flashing. After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of

paper which read: You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water,

avoid

heavy labor.  It will be better in two weeks.

That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how

it

would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this could

be

fooled. He decided to give it a try.

He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, and urine

samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into

the

concoction. He went back to the drug store,located the computer, poured

in

the sample and deposited the $10.00. The machine again made the usual

noises,

flashed lights, and printed out the following analysis:

1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.

2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.

3. Your daughter is getting' screwed by three guys at the same time and

having urinary infection. Put her on antibiotic and keep a track of her

outings.

4. Your wife is pregnant . . . twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a

lawyer.

5. And bastard,....... if you don't stop jerking off, your elbow will

never

get better !!!!!!!

fuckin awesome man ! you rock *=: " "

good one buddy...

!':