Random Jokes/one-Liners..

[BillMarkSteve]

[The Warrior]

Salesgirl :Sir no smoking in d shop
Man: but i bought cigarettes frm ur shop.


Lol
Salesgirl: Sir we sell Condoms too, bt it doesn mean u start Fu-king us right here..

[arshad]

Things we should be learning from dogs:

1. Love
2. Trust
3. Loyalty
BUT
What we learned - POSITION.

[summer27]

ltt for humane and manonfire..

[summer27]

Satire is being silly about the serious. Romance is the exact opposite

[mahesh1]

Welcome back summer 

[summer27]

If a guy remembered your eye color after the first date you probably have small b*o*o*bs

[summer27]

Welcome back summer 

[manjunath455]

If a guy remembered your eye color after the first date you probably have small b*o*o*bs

:giggle:

[summer27]

What’s the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

[summer27]

A an old man in his 70's walked into a bar.  After a while, a girl with a purple, blue, red (rainbow) colorful hair came in. The old man kept staring at the girl.

 

The girl got mad and said, “Hey old man, didn’t you do anything crazy when you were young.

 

Old man replied, “I did, like f*cking a parrot and I was wondering if you were my daughter.”

[summer27]

A man is dying of cancer, but keeps telling people he is dying of AIDS.

His son asked Dad why? He answered, so that when I am dead, no one will chase your mum.

[summer27]

One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband starts rubbing his wife’s arm.

 

The wife turns over and says “I’m sorry honey, I’ve got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh.”

 

The husband, rejected, turns over.

 

A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again.

 

“Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow too?”

[manjunath455]

One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband starts rubbing his wife’s arm.

The wife turns over and says “I’m sorry honey, I’ve got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh.”

The husband, rejected, turns over.

A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again.

“Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow too?”

:giggle: :giggle:

[summer27]

One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver.

She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so.

She says, “Anything you say can and will be held against you.”

He replies “B*RE*ASTS.”