Random Jokes/one-Liners..

[summer27]

[font="System,Helvetica"][size="2"]A man is walking past this house when a used condom comes flying out of the second story window and lands squarely on his head. [/size][/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"][size="2"]Rather disgusted and absolutely furious, he goes up to the front door and starts pounding on it. [/size][/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"][size="2"]An elderly man opens it and asks him what caused him to knock so loudly. The passer-by asks, "Who's in your upstairs room?"[/size][/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"][size="2"]The elderly man replies, I can't see how it's any of your business. Since, you must know, my daughter and intended son-in-law are upstairs." [/size][/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"][size="2"]The passer-by hands him the used condom and says, "Well, I just wanted you to know that your intended grandchild fell out the window!"[/size][/font]

[balu_gani]

[quote name='summer27' timestamp='1336456564' post='1301754807']
[font=System,Helvetica][size=2]A man is walking past this house when a used condom comes flying out of the second story window and lands squarely on his head. [/size][/font]
[font=System,Helvetica][size=2]Rather disgusted and absolutely furious, he goes up to the front door and starts pounding on it. [/size][/font]
[font=System,Helvetica][size=2]An elderly man opens it and asks him what caused him to knock so loudly. The passer-by asks, "Who's in your upstairs room?"[/size][/font]
[font=System,Helvetica][size=2]The elderly man replies, I can't see how it's any of your business. Since, you must know, my daughter and intended son-in-law are upstairs." [/size][/font]
[font=System,Helvetica][size=2]The passer-by hands him the used condom and says, "Well, I just wanted you to know that your intended grandchild fell out the window!"[/size][/font]
[/quote]
[img]http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-uVrKSBXQyYQ/T3Lf9zUD5hI/AAAAAAAACj0/N5TlkjuEdkc/s1600/brahmanandam+cool+GIF.gif[/img]

[summer27]

[font="System,Helvetica"][size="2"]A man came home from work one day to find his wife sitting on the front porch with her bags packed. He asked her where she was going and she replied "I'm going."[/size][/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"][size="2"]He questioned her as to why she was going and she told him "I just found out that I can make $400.00 a night doing what I give you for free".[/size][/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"][size="2"]He pondered that, then went into the house and packed his bags and returned to the porch with his wife.[/size][/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"][size="2"]She said "And just where do you think you are going?"[/size][/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"][size="2"]He replied "I'm going too".[/size][/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"][size="2"]"Why?" She asked. He said "I want to see how you are going to live on $800.00 a year".[/size][/font]

[summer27]

[font="System,Helvetica"]Bad Bernie was in prison for seven years. The day he got out, his wife and son were there to pick him up. He came through the gates and got into the car.[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]The only thing he said was, "F.F."[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]His wife turned to him and answered, "E.F."[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]Out on the highway, he said, "F.F."[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]She responded simply, "E.F."[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]He repeated, "F.F."[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]She again replied, "E.F."[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]"Mom! Dad!" their son yelled. "What's going on?"[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]Bad Bernie answered, "Your mother wants to eat first!"[/font]

[summer27]

[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]What kind of bees produce milk? [/font][/color]
[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]Boo[b]biees[/b][/font][/color]

[summer27]

[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]Only 10% of men have brains... The rest have wives or girlfriends!!!![/font][/color]

[summer27]

[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]When a lady is pregnant,Everyone touches the belly & says congrats.[/font][/color]
[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]No one touches the penis to say"Good Job"[/font][/color]
[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]Moral of the story:Hard work is never appreciated[/font][/color]

[manmadudhu]

[quote name='summer27' timestamp='1336459269' post='1301755115']
[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]When a lady is pregnant,Everyone touches the belly & says congrats.[/font][/color]
[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]No one touches the penis to say"Good Job"[/font][/color]
[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]Moral of the story:Hard work is never appreciated[/font][/color]
[/quote]

[summer27]

[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]Abhay Deol refused a marriage proposal from Sunny Leone because he didn't want a wife named Sunny Deol!!![/font][/color]

[balu_gani]

[quote name='summer27' timestamp='1336459269' post='1301755115']
[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]When a lady is pregnant,Everyone touches the belly & says congrats.[/font][/color]
[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]No one touches the penis to say"Good Job"[/font][/color]
[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]Moral of the story:Hard work is never appreciated[/font][/color]
[/quote]
[img]http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vXer8MQYZrM/T1jw_Q2juqI/AAAAAAAAB_g/Upm7DId5ox0/s1600/brahmi+laugh.gif[/img]

[raghav198]

[img]http://oi49.tinypic.com/wllwj.jpg[/img]

[summer27]

[color=#333333][font=HelveticaNeue,]Wedding:the day when a girl stands on stage&looks at all the hot men and wonders"where the hell were all these handsome looking guys all these days"[/font][/color]

[summer27]

[font="System,Helvetica"]It is two o'clock in the morning and a husband and his wife are asleep when suddenly the phone rings.[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]The husband picks up the phone and says, "Hello?.... How the heck would I know? - Am i the weather man?" promptly slamming the phone down.[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]His wife rolls over and asks, "Who was that?"[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]The husband replies, "I don't know, it was some guy who wanted to know if the coast was clear."[/font]

[summer27]

[font="System,Helvetica"]Joey's teacher sent a note home to his Mother saying, "Joey seems to be a very bright boy, but spends too much of his time thinking about sex and girls."[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]The Mother wrote back the next day, "If you find a solution, please advise. I have the same problem with his Father."[/font]

[summer27]

[font="System,Helvetica"]A man was bragging about his sister who disguised herself, as a man and joined the army."But, wait a minute," said the listener, "She'll have to dress with the boys and shower with them, too, won't she?"[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]"Sure," replied the man.[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]"Well, won't they find out?"[/font]
[font="System,Helvetica"]The man shrugged. "Who's gonna tell?"[/font]