Some more jokes

[master123]

Smartest Salesman

Three salesmen were bragging who is the best.

The first said, that he is so good he sold a color television to a blind man.

The second bragged he sold a HI-FI stereo system to a deaf man.

The third said he sold a Cuckoo clock to Banta.

The other two said, so what?

The third salesman added, "Along with the Cuckoo clock, I also sold him fifty kgs of bird seeds!!!!!"

Last Night

One day, a man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. Then he asks for another. After a couple more drinks, the bartender gets worried.

"What's the matter?" the bartender asks.

"That woman I call my wife and I got into a fight," explained the man, "and now she isn't talking to me for a whole 31 days."

The bartender thought about this for a while. "But, isn't it a good thing that she isn't talking to you?" asked the bartender.

"Yeah, except today is the last night."

Speed limit

A traffic Policeman stopped a woman for exceeding the posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name.

She said, "I'm Mrs. Ladislav Abdulkhashim Zybkcicraznovskaya from the Republic of Uzbekistan visiting my daughter in Columbia."

As she finished speaking the cop paused for a moment and then put away his summons book and pen, and said, "Well... OK... but don't let me catch you speeding again."

Wrong bus!

Santa and Banta are walking home after a night on the piss. They've got no money to get a taxi and are staggering all over the place when they find themselves outside the bus depot.

Santa has a brainwave and says to Banta, "Get in there and steal a bus so we can drive home and I'll stay out here and look out for the police".

Banta breaks into the garage and is gone for twenty minutes while Santa is wondering what the hell he's doing.

Eventually Santa sticks his head around the door and sees Banta running from bus to bus and looking very worried.

"What the hell are you doing, get a move on!"

To which Banta replies, "I can't find a number 25B anywhere".

Whereupon Santa, holding his hands to his head in disbelief, shouts, "You idiot, steal a number 27 and we'll get off at the roundabout and walk the rest of the way!"

[COOLDUDE]