Are you close to your father ?

[Pichekkistha]

I was never close to my father.... and i don't want to be either....... This post might be to find if i am alone and if not, may be it consoles me.

In fact he is not close to neither my mother nor my brother. But i always find him talking / laughing a lot with relatives / friends . I don't understand what he is is trying to achieve. My mother..she can't utter a word / give suggestion or complain on anything at all. Its been close to 30 yrs. I feel $orry  for her.

I don't remember an instance that we were together... went to a restaurant, a movie, a trip, a ride nor a fun chat either. All he spoke to me was to either warn me or yell at me. I used to get out when he comes home for lunch. Never felt like sharing anything. Even under a low phase of life, he didn't support (except financially). I sponsored US visa for them 3 yrs back and been asking to visit because my mother wants to come. he doesn't visit and doesn't let even my mother visit.

I am not even sure if i like him...Generally, i am a happy & contended person. Don't have complains on anyone in life except him. He is over 55 now. I don't even know if i will be able to take care of him by myself when he grows older.

[sivanadha]

There might be some reason for this  .. How does he behave with you before friends and  relatives . .my father used to be a bit strict when I was young but he has eased up a lot now 

[sarkaar]

mee father neeku  nachina, nachakapoyina, neeku janamnichina thandri.. nuvvu e stage varaku edigav unnav ante becuase of your father eh kada..

irrespective of his behaviour it is your responsibility to take care when your parents gets older.

you may  feel later if you hate him now..

[sivanadha]

Just now, sarkaar said:

mee father neeku  nachina, nachakapoyina, neeku janamnichina thandri.. nuvvu e stage varaku edigav unnav ante becuase of your father eh kada..

irrespective of his behaviour it is your responsibility to take care when your parents gets older.

you may  feel later if you hate him now..

+1

[JUJUBI_JULABI]

everyone have their own type of attachment with their parents, nuvvu ne side nunchi emina effort pedathava asalu ? , when hes sick, call and ask how hes feeling and all ?

relationship build cheyali bayya, just expect chestey em radhu, am sure he even has a same story like you, he might tell everyone that his son never cared or at least tried to ane.

ikkada vachi manam chala independent aythamu, some things we take it granted, i would suggest , go home and spend time only with your paretnts, go out and talk what ever you feel like .

[vendetta]

12 minutes ago, Pichekkistha said:

I was never close to my father.... and i don't want to be either....... This post might be to find if i am alone and if not, may be it consoles me.

In fact he is not close to neither my mother nor my brother. But i always find him talking / laughing a lot with relatives / friends . I don't understand what he is is trying to achieve. My mother..she can't utter a word / give suggestion or complain on anything at all. Its been close to 30 yrs. I feel $orry  for her.

I don't remember an instance that we were together... went to a restaurant, a movie, a trip, a ride nor a fun chat either. All he spoke to me was to either warn me or yell at me. I used to get out when he comes home for lunch. Never felt like sharing anything. Even under a low phase of life, he didn't support (except financially). I sponsored US visa for them 3 yrs back and been asking to visit because my mother wants to come. he doesn't visit and doesn't let even my mother visit.

I am not even sure if i like him...Generally, i am a happy & contended person. Don't have complains on anyone in life except him. He is over 55 now. I don't even know if i will be able to take care of him by myself when he grows older.

kasta nenu connect ayyanu nee story ki 

even my dad doesn't want to visit usa till I get settled , inka evari mida depend avvaru avvaniyaru mamalni gani and bro n mom ni gani, everything has to come from his pockets and porapatuna kuda gifts money em tiskoru .My parents doesn't want to depend on children in old age and they made retirement plans very well .Kontamandi parents ante man  ,but bhayam dad vastunnaru ante tv off cheskuni chaduvkodam lanti acting chesetollam

but baga tippevaru movies , restaurant , places trips baga tiskelievaru . Kurchopetti matladevaru , evening walks ki tiskelli matladevaru ,dairyam cheppevaru , peddaga ayyaka  he became freind of mine

US vaste phone talks chala formalga untay ela unnaru , health Bagunda inte, busy untaru  work toh so ekuva matladdam kudardu, amma toh ekuva phone conversations

I love my dad so much, he is my hero

 

[Pichekkistha]

2 minutes ago, sivanadha said:

There might be some reason for this  .. How does he behave with you before friends and  relatives . .my father used to be a bit strict when I was young but he has eased up a lot now 

We don't talk at all generally.... unless he or myself has a question or info to exchange.

[sarkaar]

2 minutes ago, vendetta said:

kasta nenu connect ayyanu nee story ki 

even my dad doesn't want to visit usa till I get settled , inka evari mida depend avvaru avvaniyaru mamalni gani and bro n mom ni gani, everything has to come from his pockets and porapatuna gifts money em tiskoru   ,but bhayam dad vastunnaru ante tv off cheskuni chaduvkodam lanti acting chesetollam

but baga tippevaru movies , restaurant , places trips baga tiskelievaru . Kurchopetti matladevaru , evening walks ki tiskelli matladevaru ,dairyam cheppevaru , peddaga ayyaka  he became freind of mine

I love my dad so much, he is my hero

 

anni positivies mee nannagaru gurinchi mataldi malli athani story tho  etta connect ayyav Mrs. Madhavan? ani @idibezwada just asking

[Pichekkistha]

2 minutes ago, vendetta said:

kasta nenu connect ayyanu nee story ki 

even my dad doesn't want to visit usa till I get settled , inka evari mida depend avvaru avvaniyaru mamalni gani and bro n mom ni gani, everything has to come from his pockets and porapatuna gifts money em tiskoru   ,but bhayam dad vastunnaru ante tv off cheskuni chaduvkodam lanti acting chesetollam

but baga tippevaru movies , restaurant , places trips baga tiskelievaru . Kurchopetti matladevaru , evening walks ki tiskelli matladevaru ,dairyam cheppevaru , peddaga ayyaka  he became freind of mine

I love my dad so much, he is my hero

 

One lucky fellow...

[dasara_bullodu]

7 minutes ago, Pichekkistha said:

I was never close to my father.... and i don't want to be either....... This post might be to find if i am alone and if not, may be it consoles me.

In fact he is not close to neither my mother nor my brother. But i always find him talking / laughing a lot with relatives / friends . I don't understand what he is is trying to achieve. My mother..she can't utter a word / give suggestion or complain on anything at all. Its been close to 30 yrs. I feel $orry  for her.

I don't remember an instance that we were together... went to a restaurant, a movie, a trip, a ride nor a fun chat either. All he spoke to me was to either warn me or yell at me. I used to get out when he comes home for lunch. Never felt like sharing anything. Even under a low phase of life, he didn't support (except financially). I sponsored US visa for them 3 yrs back and been asking to visit because my mother wants to come. he doesn't visit and doesn't let even my mother visit.

I am not even sure if i like him...Generally, i am a happy & contended person. Don't have complains on anyone in life except him. He is over 55 now. I don't even know if i will be able to take care of him by myself when he grows older.

 

 

Amul Baby ... US ki financial support ivvatam joke anukunnava .. .repu nee pillalaki BMW car adigithe koni pedatavemo alochinchu

job gatra vadilesi nee kosam visit ki vastaru ankunnava.. neeku leaves ela dorakavo vallaki kooda same situation untundi

[Pichekkistha]

3 minutes ago, JUJUBI_JULABI said:

everyone have their own type of attachment with their parents, nuvvu ne side nunchi emina effort pedathava asalu ? , when hes sick, call and ask how hes feeling and all ?

relationship build cheyali bayya, just expect chestey em radhu, am sure he even has a same story like you, he might tell everyone that his son never cared or at least tried to ane.

ikkada vachi manam chala independent aythamu, some things we take it granted, i would suggest , go home and spend time only with your paretnts, go out and talk what ever you feel like .

I think i did start a little... no +ve response from that side... May be i will have to try a bit more.... and the thing is i don't want to be close to him... may be i am used to being this way. I sadi he is the same with each one of us in the family.

[Pichekkistha]

1 minute ago, dasara_bullodu said:

Amul Baby ... US ki financial support ivvatam joke anukunnava .. .repu nee pillalaki BMW car adigithe koni pedatavemo alochinchu

Take it easy.. you didn't get the point...

[sarkaar]

2 minutes ago, Pichekkistha said:

I think i did start a little... no +ve response from that side... May be i will have to try a bit more.... and the thing is i don't want to be close to him... may be i am used to being this way. I sadi he is the same with each one of us in the family.

manushulu brathiki unnapudu value teliyadhu. ego's and emotions valana dooram chesukontaru..

manishi poyake, aa manishi viluva telustundhi. Andulonu he is your dad. just think what you are doing..

[JUJUBI_JULABI]

1 minute ago, Pichekkistha said:

I think i did start a little... no +ve response from that side... May be i will have to try a bit more.... and the thing is i don't want to be close to him... may be i am used to being this way. I sadi he is the same with each one of us in the family.

ok nothing wrong in it then, me iddaru own space lo untunnaru antey (both reserve types), as long as there is no bad feelings/hurt between you both , this still can be acceptable .

[vendetta]

3 minutes ago, sarkaar said:

anni positivies mee nannagaru gurinchi mataldi malli athani story tho  etta connect ayyav Mrs. Madhavan? ani @idibezwada just asking

ma intlo ma daddy de domination. ma mom no chepparu ma dad mataku . so Ala connect ayyanu