'Sorry I turned out to be a waste': IIT Hyderabad student commits suicide, leaves haunting note

[tacobell fan]

A student of the Indian Institute of Technology, Hyderabad, allegedly committed suicide by hanging himself from the ceiling fan in his hostel room, police said Tuesday.

This is the second suicide this year at the institution. Sangareddy Deputy Superintendent of Police P. Sridhar Reddy said the student Mark Andrew Charles, 20, had gone to his hostel room at about 11 pm Monday.

 

As he did not show up, his friends broke open the door of his room in the afternoon Tuesday and found him hanging, the DSP said.

He said the student, who was pursuing his Master in Designing, had completed his final year exam some days ago and he was preparing for his final presentation.

He hailed from Naria Lanka locality in Varanasi district of Uttar Pradesh.

'DO NOT MISS ME'

Police found a suicide note written in his diary in which he mentioned that he may not get good marks and there was no future for "failures in the world", the DSP said. Anxiety and depression may be the reason for the suicide, police said.

Andrew mentioned names of some of his friends in the note recalling his association with them, police said.

"I never thought I would end up letting all of you down. Do not miss me. I dont deserve it I am not worthy. Just know that I love you all back just the way you did because that is what friends do right? And also I am not doing this because I am sad now..."

Police said he expressed regret to his parents for not being able to do justice to all their sacrifices.

"Thank you for being the best parents.. I am I turned out to be such a waste," he said in the suicide note. IIT-Hyderabad condoled the death of its student.

I never thought I would end up letting all of you down. Do not miss me. I dont deserve it I am not worthy

"This is indeed an irreparable loss to the institute and the family. May his soul rest in peace," the institution said. A case has been registered, police said, adding that the body was shifted to a government hospital for autopsy.

His parents are on their way from Varanasi, the DSP said.

On January 31 this year, M. Anirudh, a third year student of Mechanical and Aerospace engineering, committed suicide by jumping from the hostel building.

[tacobell fan]

Starting the letter by saying that he had decided to call it quits, the 25-year-old student asked his friends to stay strong in their lives. He also had a few positive things to his friend Neel, writing that humanity was the key, and asked him to remember this always. He told his friends: “Ankit, Rajjo, IT Kam karte karte apne life mat bhul jana, live a little every day. Eki zindagi mili hai”.

Addressing his parents, Mark wrote that he could not meet their expectations. “I don’t have a good portfolio, got bad grades and no job. I am I could not do justice to all your sacrifices,” he wrote.

The body was shifted to Government Hospital, Sangareddy, and the parents are expected to reach the town by Wednesday morning.

DSP, Sangareddy, Sridhar Reddy visited the IIT-H campus on coming to know about the incident. Speaking to the media, he said Mark left for his hostel room a bit early at 11 pm on Monday night, though he usually spends time with his friends till midnight. After he failed to come out of the room even after 2 pm the following afternoon and also failed to respond to messages and phone calls, his friends and management broke open the door. As Mark dated his letter July 2, the police came to the conclusion that he died in the early hours of Tuesday after writing the suicide note. His friends, faculty and classmates broke down on seeing his lifeless body.

[Beardman]

Being serious about life leads to stress and depression , Results in release of

Adrenaline VS Norepinephrine/ flight or fight/ life or death.(Animals also have it but they dont go for suicide). Atleast animals are safe.

Lack of higher consciousness blocks the release of certain chemicals too, but they could not notice the internal biological function until they die.

[prasadr]

58 minutes ago, Beardman said:

Being serious about life leads to stress and depression , Results in release of

Adrenaline VS Norepinephrine/ flight or fight/ life or death.(Animals also have it but they dont go for suicide). Atleast animals are safe.

Lack of higher consciousness blocks the release of certain chemicals too, but they could not notice the internal biological function until they die.

 

Add to it urbanization of culture where even in a large group you are all alone....

Gone are the days when family, friends, society, culture & religion could add as buffers and help humans cope up with ups and down in our life.

 

The incredible isolation person feels all the while living in crowded places is a new construct of "modern culture"

Few western countries have identified this as issue and are addressing it.

[aakathaai369]

Chaduvukunna tharvatha keekarakaai annadanta yenakatiki ilaantodu IIT laanti peddha chaduvulu chaduvuthuu markule chaduvuki kolamaanam ani anukodam amayakathvame chaduvuni mundhu nerchukondra babu markulu ave vasthaai chasthe emosthadi boodida thappa

[pootareku]

I felt same some times but I am scared

[tacobell fan]

12 minutes ago, pootareku said:

I felt same some times but I am scared

you need to talk to people more often and outgoing. 

[mustang302]

1 hour ago, aakathaai369 said:

Chaduvukunna tharvatha keekarakaai annadanta yenakatiki ilaantodu IIT laanti peddha chaduvulu chaduvuthuu markule chaduvuki kolamaanam ani anukodam amayakathvame chaduvuni mundhu nerchukondra babu markulu ave vasthaai chasthe emosthadi boodida thappa

Markulu vachai kabattae IIT li unnadu ga..lekapothae happy ga edho oka college lo B TECH chesi USA lo settle ayyevaadu..!

[aakathaai369]

1 minute ago, mustang302 said:

Markulu vachai kabattae IIT li unnadu ga..lekapothae happy ga edho oka college lo B TECH chesi USA lo settle ayyevaadu..!

Education ni treat chese vidhanam gurinchi chepthunnaa college lo b.tech chadive vaadiki iit vaadiki adhe theda college lo chadive vaallallo mostly markulu certificate le anukuntaru chaduvante IIT Range vaadu primary gaa education is like learning anukune mentality undaali marks secondary talent unnodiki marks peddha vishayam kaadu

[meri_zindagi]

We donno marks is the only reason, he has mentioned that he is not worthy. In what way ? 

If we find any toy or something got repaired, we will throw it and get rid of it. We humans always prefer to have everything the best, atleast something we feel worthy. Oka phone konali antey 1000 aina 1lakh aina, we consider if it is WORTHY. He himself felt unworthy and he wanted to get rid of that. Ala enduku feel avtunnadu anedi question chesukuni danni fix chesukovali. After all, worthiness is our perception and not the truth.

[pottipotato]

27 minutes ago, meri_zindagi said:

We donno marks is the only reason, he has mentioned that he is not worthy. In what way ? 

If we find any toy or something got repaired, we will throw it and get rid of it. We humans always prefer to have everything the best, atleast something we feel worthy. Oka phone konali antey 1000 aina 1lakh aina, we consider if it is WORTHY. He himself felt unworthy and he wanted to get rid of that. Ala enduku feel avtunnadu anedi question chesukuni danni fix chesukovali. After all, worthiness is our perception and not the truth. 

Have you ever studied in the best school, the best university, along with the best students? you have no idea what it does to students minds, especially when they don't have friends in that environment.

here there are a few people who claim eamcet top 10 ranks, but they've never given me the impression that they rubbed shoulders with the best students. its a different ball game, if you come from a humble background.

[pottipotato]

2 hours ago, tacobell fan said:

you need to talk to people more often and outgoing. 

so introverted people can suffer in depression aa? lol.

that's not the solution.

institutionally there has to be more awareness of students needs. Its not a fcuking chai stall, where they just teach and provide labs like selling chai. there has to be support systems for students.

[meri_zindagi]

1 minute ago, pottipotato said:

Have you ever studied in the best school, the best university, along with the best students? you have no idea what it does to students minds, especially when they don't have friends in that environment.

here there are a few people who claim eamcet top 10 ranks, but they've never given me the impression that they rubbed shoulders with the best students. its a different ball game, if you come from a humble background.

I did I did with the best students and best teachers. And I felt that unworthiness but not because of marks for sure. Nuvu bitsian aa. 

[pottipotato]

studying in some thukda university, or hanging around people with IQ less than 90 is easy, and you can feel like you are king of the world. you can have so much confidence, because you notice that the rich people are not particularly smart or intelligent, and that you are provided opportunities to make money and become rich too, inspite of your utter uselessness.

but studying in a competitive environment like the IIT, MIT, Stanford, will kill the student if he's not mentally prepared for it. Even if the student is many times smarter and talented than you are.

[pottipotato]

2 minutes ago, meri_zindagi said:

I did I did with the best students and best teachers. And I felt that unworthiness but not because of marks for sure. Nuvu bitsian aa. 

bits is not an elite institute.

i did my undergraduate in NUS singapore.