Desire to return to India - faux nostalgia? An analogy.

[nosugarplease]

2 minutes ago, krishnaaa said:

I went through the exact same emotions.

Now I am very happy here.

Raising kids in India is equivalent to child abuse......everything is polluted there ....even the people.

You have to have a good family and friends near you ....then life is good in US.

There are lot of people in India....but no use.....even though they want to be positive, that environment makes them negative. They are lonelier even though they are surrounded with people.

Try to exercise daily and try to find yourself......its much easier in US as you will have lot of time and space at your disposal.

Ledhu......adhe kampu loki veltha ante ...your choice.

nuv annadi correcte brother.. naa story India longing kaadhu...
india lo festivals , food , environment miss avvadam gurinchi kadhu.. my topic more towards parents.

recent gaane start ayyindhi.. worry about parents and indirectly the reason behind that is because I chose to come to US... ikkadki rakunte  aa kampu kampu ani telvakapothunde ani ..
but again that train left long time back...vachinam, like you said make most of it..

kaani.. also need to plan about parents ..as we only have a few years of them..and we will not be next to them when things suddenly go south...

[nosugarplease]

4 minutes ago, nosugarplease said:

nuv annadi correcte brother.. naa story India longing kaadhu...
india lo festivals , food , environment miss avvadam gurinchi kadhu.. my topic more towards parents.

recent gaane start ayyindhi.. worry about parents and indirectly the reason behind that is because I chose to come to US... ikkadki rakunte  aa kampu kampu ani telvakapothunde ani ..
but again that train left long time back...vachinam, like you said make most of it..

kaani.. also need to plan about parents ..as we only have a few years of them..and we will not be next to them when things suddenly go south...

my close friend father passed away recently..uncle very close to me also.
 i was affected and putting myself in his shoes and thinking like this..thats why may be not every one can relate to my posts about parents.

 

[krishnaaa]

9 minutes ago, nosugarplease said:

nuv annadi correcte brother.. naa story India longing kaadhu...
india lo festivals , food , environment miss avvadam gurinchi kadhu.. my topic more towards parents.

recent gaane start ayyindhi.. worry about parents and indirectly the reason behind that is because I chose to come to US... ikkadki rakunte  aa kampu kampu ani telvakapothunde ani ..
but again that train left long time back...vachinam, like you said make most of it..

kaani.. also need to plan about parents ..as we only have a few years of them..and we will not be next to them when things suddenly go south...

Its part of life. If you can....take a break and be with your parents.....try to balance things.

Then there won't be any regret later.

Try to save and invest so that you can have control over your life.

I have seen many of us who love their parents but can't be with them as they sold their soul for an expensive car, big house etc.

Focus on people and you will be fine.  Parents passing away will happen and everyone goes through it. I went through it as well....was painful for couple years till I had my own....you can see your parents in your kids.

[JAMBALHOT_RAJA]

Parents fault kuda undi, vallu veellu America potunaru ani pillalni elagaina America pampistaru, old age vachaka pillalu daggara unte baguntadi ani feel avutaru but ee gap lo valla pillalaki own family form ayuntadi America lo and they are locked here

[Sarvapindy]

1 hour ago, krishnaaa said:

I went through the exact same emotions.

Now I am very happy here.

Raising kids in India is equivalent to child abuse......everything is polluted there ....even the people.

You have to have a good family and friends near you ....then life is good in US.

There are lot of people in India....but no use.....even though they want to be positive, that environment makes them negative. They are lonelier even though they are surrounded with people.

Try to exercise daily and try to find yourself......its much easier in US as you will have lot of time and space at your disposal.

Ledhu......adhe kampu loki veltha ante ...your choice.

👎

[Aamphat]

4 hours ago, JambaKrantu said:

20 cr+ Money unte India pondi.. Life will be luxury, you never have to drive, never have to cook..

lekapote mooskuni ikkade dobbinchukondi

daaniki inta essays waste

On a serious note, Is 10 cr not enough??

[yoda123]

well life is only half cup if in US or in India

US half cup:

Half cup water : Good day to day life, no hiccups of day to day life like, power blackout, mosquitoes, potholes, muddy roads, lack of cacophonic traffic,. Good life: BIg house, Big Car, BIg monies, good travels, good education for children etc ... not needing higher person in power for day to day activity ...

Remaining half cup empty: Missing parents, siblings ... our children not having a bonding with our parents n siblings n cousins ... ( this can be partly resolved via making sure India trips every year / other year)...

India Half cup:

Good emotional bondings up to a point (later all emotional bonds become toxic and selfish though) ...

so need a balance ... !!

[linksys23]

8 hours ago, JAMBALHOT_RAJA said:

Parents fault kuda undi, vallu veellu America potunaru ani pillalni elagaina America pampistaru, old age vachaka pillalu daggara unte baguntadi ani feel avutaru but ee gap lo valla pillalaki own family form ayuntadi America lo and they are locked here

2 guud chala baga cheppavu...parents arevery selfish ...when we are batchelor they will take our money and when we have kids they want us back...its not possible ani telidu vallaki

[tennisluvrredux]

15 hours ago, Tyrannosauraus_Rex said:

When I was young - for every summer vacation we used to go to Rajahmundry, Kakinada and other small villages and towns in Andhra Pradesh. Although I am from Hyderabad - most of my relatives were/are from Andhra.

One of the relatives I loved really loved - was my Mavayya - my mother's younger brother. 

My affection for my uncle was so strong that I used to dream about the vacation almost a month in advance. He was a strongly built man, kind, showered immense love on our family and essentially I looked up to him.

It was one of those summer vacations when I was in Rajahmundry -and one evening my uncle and I went to a vegetable market. It rained pretty heavily earlier and we stepped out once the rains relented.

Ala nadusthu nenu  -  "Mavayya, varsham padinappudu Rajahmundry inka entha andamga undo kada" - 

To this my uncle's response was brutally sarcastic and I still remember it to this day.

He said "Orai, neeku naa meeda unna abhimaanamtho -naaku relatedga unna anni vishayaalu neeku andamga anipisthunnayi. 

"Neekemo varshamlo Rajahmundry andamga kanipisthundi - kaani naakemo road meda burada, domalu, open drainage meeda pandulu, nuvvu vesukunna hawai chappals valla nuvvu nadusthunnapudu aa chappals lonchi burada ni venkala shirt meeda padadam, nee aa burada shirt ni uthakaleka attayya padey kastaalu,  kaaseptalo current pothey vacchey ikkatlu - ivvani kanipisthunnai.

"Nuvveymo current pothey ee kovvathula veluthurulo mee illu entha bavundi mavayya antaavu - nenemo nee gurinchi mosquito net ready chesthuntey".

"Crux of the matter enti antey - neeku ivvani andamga, teeyaga anipisthayi endukantey - subconsciously you know in the heart of your hearts that you are only going to stay here for a week or two- you are actually not going to experience or live here in Rajahmundry on a permanent basis. So, intha short stay lo nee emotions anni baaga condense ayipoyi anni adbhuthamga, anni andamga anipisthayi. Adey nuvvu Hyderabad vadilesi puurthi ga Rajahmundry shift aithey nee paata verey laaga untundi.  Aina neeku ivvani ippudu artham kaavu - you will remember this conversation in the future.

 

My uncle died a few years later after that conversation and I was devastated. Kaani naaku chaala years taruvatha artham ayyindi what he actually meant ani.

 

Kontha mandi friends -  India vellinappudu for a few weeks - prathidi chaala nostalgic ga, andamga anipisthundi but maybe because they know they are not actually going to stay there permanently. They are secure in the knowledge that they will back in the US after a few weeks/months.

Asalu nijam ga antha India antey istam untey - asalu India vadilivelley vaallamey kadu kada. I still remember my Dad's tears at the airport when I first left India.

I am not saying that the nostalgic feeling we get is not genuine but I am convinced that some people get that strong feeling because they know they are actually not going to stay in India. I mean imagine- for example -  their true feelings while they are lamenting/longing about India - they got news that they got deported or their GC got canceled. Appudu nostalgia antha pooyi, India lo undey corruption, police brutality, politics, relatives tho lolli - ivvani gurthu vasthayi - if you were to stay back in India permanently.

So all those people who are in the US - count your lucky stars - you are in a much better country than India. And the fact that you chose to leave India is evidence of it.

Either way it was my uncle's death anniversary recently and I remembered that conversation in Rajahmundry all those years ago - just wanted to share it with you guys.

 

 

 

Great post bro.

 Thanks for sharing it with us 

[krishnaaa]

8 hours ago, Aamphat said:

On a serious note, Is 10 cr not enough??

Even 100 Cr isn't enough.

 

[yemdoing]

endi... homework la anni paras chadavala 

[Telugodura456]

Rajamundry is not same as america.

in rajamundry ppl look like you, talk like you - it just happens to be poor.

in america you have money.

Yes people value money and comforts enough to ditch their own relatives or even parents.

But in the end  best is to develop ones own areas - so you can have everything. Whether it is possible in india or not is another question.

[kasi]

17 hours ago, Tyrannosauraus_Rex said:

When I was young - for every summer vacation we used to go to Rajahmundry, Kakinada and other small villages and towns in Andhra Pradesh. Although I am from Hyderabad - most of my relatives were/are from Andhra.

One of the relatives I loved really loved - was my Mavayya - my mother's younger brother. 

My affection for my uncle was so strong that I used to dream about the vacation almost a month in advance. He was a strongly built man, kind, showered immense love on our family and essentially I looked up to him.

It was one of those summer vacations when I was in Rajahmundry -and one evening my uncle and I went to a vegetable market. It rained pretty heavily earlier and we stepped out once the rains relented.

Ala nadusthu nenu  -  "Mavayya, varsham padinappudu Rajahmundry inka entha andamga undo kada" - 

To this my uncle's response was brutally sarcastic and I still remember it to this day.

He said "Orai, neeku naa meeda unna abhimaanamtho -naaku relatedga unna anni vishayaalu neeku andamga anipisthunnayi. 

"Neekemo varshamlo Rajahmundry andamga kanipisthundi - kaani naakemo road meda burada, domalu, open drainage meeda pandulu, nuvvu vesukunna hawai chappals valla nuvvu nadusthunnapudu aa chappals lonchi burada ni venkala shirt meeda padadam, nee aa burada shirt ni uthakaleka attayya padey kastaalu,  kaaseptalo current pothey vacchey ikkatlu - ivvani kanipisthunnai.

"Nuvveymo current pothey ee kovvathula veluthurulo mee illu entha bavundi mavayya antaavu - nenemo nee gurinchi mosquito net ready chesthuntey".

"Crux of the matter enti antey - neeku ivvani andamga, teeyaga anipisthayi endukantey - subconsciously you know in the heart of your hearts that you are only going to stay here for a week or two- you are actually not going to experience or live here in Rajahmundry on a permanent basis. So, intha short stay lo nee emotions anni baaga condense ayipoyi anni adbhuthamga, anni andamga anipisthayi. Adey nuvvu Hyderabad vadilesi puurthi ga Rajahmundry shift aithey nee paata verey laaga untundi.  Aina neeku ivvani ippudu artham kaavu - you will remember this conversation in the future.

 

My uncle died a few years later after that conversation and I was devastated. Kaani naaku chaala years taruvatha artham ayyindi what he actually meant ani.

 

Kontha mandi friends -  India vellinappudu for a few weeks - prathidi chaala nostalgic ga, andamga anipisthundi but maybe because they know they are not actually going to stay there permanently. They are secure in the knowledge that they will back in the US after a few weeks/months.

Asalu nijam ga antha India antey istam untey - asalu India vadilivelley vaallamey kadu kada. I still remember my Dad's tears at the airport when I first left India.

I am not saying that the nostalgic feeling we get is not genuine but I am convinced that some people get that strong feeling because they know they are actually not going to stay in India. I mean imagine- for example -  their true feelings while they are lamenting/longing about India - they got news that they got deported or their GC got canceled. Appudu nostalgia antha pooyi, India lo undey corruption, police brutality, politics, relatives tho lolli - ivvani gurthu vasthayi - if you were to stay back in India permanently.

So all those people who are in the US - count your lucky stars - you are in a much better country than India. And the fact that you chose to leave India is evidence of it.

Either way it was my uncle's death anniversary recently and I remembered that conversation in Rajahmundry all those years ago - just wanted to share it with you guys.

 

 

 

we always want/crave for what we dont have.....not being sarcastic but crux of life 

[andhra_jp]

I am very happy for returning to india after staying in UK for 12yrs..

It all depends on mindset about what exactly you want in life..

For some india is best and others US might be home away home...

I rejected onsite opportunities after returning to india as unless compelled for any family reasons i dont want to leave India till my death.

[nosugarplease]

12 hours ago, krishnaaa said:

Its part of life. If you can....take a break and be with your parents.....try to balance things.

Then there won't be any regret later.

Try to save and invest so that you can have control over your life.

I have seen many of us who love their parents but can't be with them as they sold their soul for an expensive car, big house etc.

Focus on people and you will be fine.  Parents passing away will happen and everyone goes through it. I went through it as well....was painful for couple years till I had my own....you can see your parents in your kids.

i know i am having irrational worry about future misery.
ee feelings vachinappudu..konchem gaali ki poi, nalguru appthulatho  matladithe mood set avthundhi ..

yes balance -  atu parents , itu mana life and mana kids future
and always keep busy I guess..to avoid these worries.