Return to India

[Rushabhi]

Two cases in my opinion 

1. Go back to India when kids are small. So they can assimilate in schools. And you can get a decent job when still young. And you have time with your older relatives 

2. Go back to India in 50s after earning here and setup decent retirement income. Your kids will not accompany you since they are used to US culture. But you can retire in India.

Either way do not expect kids to stay with you or near you. They may stay wherever they want. Didn’t we make a choice to leave our parents as well?

[Complex]

1 minute ago, Rushabhi said:

Two cases in my opinion 

1. Go back to India when kids are small. So they can assimilate in schools. And you can get a decent job when still young. And you have time with your older relatives 

2. Go back to India in 50s after earning here and setup decent retirement income. Your kids will not accompany you since they are used to US culture. But you can retire in India.

Either way do not expect kids to stay with you or near you. They may stay wherever they want. Didn’t we make a choice to leave our parents as well?

baga chepparu abhi garu

[nosugarplease]

35 minutes ago, csrcsr said:

Anna yiu signed the home ?? Rates baga padayi kada in the areas yiu were looking 

no bro. konchem finance dent kuda padindhi stocks lo. so delayed..but renting a better home now...

avunu, some bigger new homes - 150k discounts in lennar tracy hils...existing homes lo kuda manchi deals vunnayi but 50% cash down laaga chesthe workout avudhi.. also, more and more new builds happening in tracyhilles

[csrcsr]

2 minutes ago, nosugarplease said:

no bro. konchem finance dent kuda padindhi stocks lo. so delayed..but renting a better home now...

avunu, some bigger new homes - 150k discounts in lennar tracy hils...existing homes lo kuda manchi deals vunnayi but 50% cash down laaga chesthe workout avudhi.. also, more and more new builds happening in tracyhilles

ok bro no rush ipatlo emi pergavu job, finances kodiga stable ayake digu , good you are renting good home with growing family 

[nosugarplease]

11 minutes ago, Rushabhi said:

Two cases in my opinion 

1. Go back to India when kids are small. So they can assimilate in schools. And you can get a decent job when still young. And you have time with your older relatives 

2. Go back to India in 50s after earning here and setup decent retirement income. Your kids will not accompany you since they are used to US culture. But you can retire in India.

Either way do not expect kids to stay with you or near you. They may stay wherever they want. Didn’t we make a choice to leave our parents as well?

option#2.

kids manki vundaru, that's ok. Kids ki manam vundamu, is that ok? 
its like we left our parents for US and we leave our kids for India.

 

[Rushabhi]

9 minutes ago, nosugarplease said:

option#2.

kids manki vundaru, that's ok. Kids ki manam vundamu, is that ok? 
its like we left our parents for US and we leave our kids for India.

 

Anduke people R2A again. I have seen many cases where people want to settle in India but kids want to settle in US. So they R2A or shuttle 

[pakeer_saab]

1 hour ago, Rushabhi said:

Aa rojulu eppudo poyinay. No one in India cares about NRIs anymore. Competition is the same no matter what. In fact it is easier for people who stayed in India all their life due to connections. 
 

there is difference between personal connections and professional connections

if one does not know what to do at 50, they must have wasted their precious time on useless things

at 50, once can even go back to Business school and start over

50's gives a lot of freedom only when you have managed to save enough for kid's education and nothing beyond

anything more given to kids beyond education will mean making them useless in life

for those who just live to accumulate for their kids, life is never easy for them

[pakeer_saab]

1 hour ago, nosugarplease said:

option#2.

kids manki vundaru, that's ok. Kids ki manam vundamu, is that ok? 
its like we left our parents for US and we leave our kids for India.

 

kids ki manam avasaram ledanuko plan chesukovali kada

by the ways things are going history repeats itself, don't expect kids to do anything for us

yearly twice visits ki vaste chaalu just like the life here in US. how does it matter if they stay connected with us or not

once you set this in your mind. life will be easy

if kids never need us. you have done a great job at parenting

 

[kevinUsa]

1 hour ago, Rushabhi said:

Two cases in my opinion 

1. Go back to India when kids are small. So they can assimilate in schools. And you can get a decent job when still young. And you have time with your older relatives 

2. Go back to India in 50s after earning here and setup decent retirement income. Your kids will not accompany you since they are used to US culture. But you can retire in India.

Either way do not expect kids to stay with you or near you. They may stay wherever they want. Didn’t we make a choice to leave our parents as well?

No matter kids will never stay with you.

It's the same we left our parents for a better future and  our kids will do the same father's day  

Mother's day ee dikku

[Kurrodu1]

On 12/12/2022 at 9:12 PM, stag said:

after kids life in USA shitty ga tayaraindi - what do you mean by that bro? What was so exciting before kids for you that you lost now? Nakaithe after kid inka bagundhi anipisthundi because I get to enjoy evenings in parks, play areas with my kid. India lo manchi expensive areas lo or villages lo unte thappa ikkada unnantha open space dorkadhu kids adukodaniki. i take my daughter to hobby classes - swimming, tennis etc. my evenings and weekends are much more satisfying here than back when I was home last year. weekend osthe evarino okarini intiki pilvadamo or manam evari intiki povadamo jarigedhi india lo. I am all in for socializing and meeting family but aa tarvatha oche drama is what I can't take.

 

No feel of belongingness - I don't know what this is. I feel like you belong to wherever you are happy. naku at present ikkada unna life e happy ga undhi compared to all that I've seen in India in the last 6 months when I was there.

Kids tho family will miss precious moments - agree with this point. danikosame at least year ki oka trip vestham.

Oka pandaga ledu pabbam ledu - bro nuvvu India velthe hyd or chennai veltha antunnav. akkada kuda almost inthe undhi.. ikkada manam Diwali, Holi etc avi aina celebrate cheskuntunnam.. India lo air pollution, water pollution ani pandagalu celebration kuda thaggicharu.. manam chinnappudu unnattu ledhu as far as I felt.

 

Pillala bdays, any other functions ki close friends tappa evaru undaru, cousins ni pilichina dooram ani raru- This is a blessing bro. less drama. close friends don't judge you. but relatives do. so cousins, relatives rakapovadam anedhi its a blessing in a disguise IMO.

Rest of the life ikkade unte, Neighbors ni, Friends ni own family (brothers, sisters, cousins) kante ekkuva importance istu edo remote place lo undipoyinattu anipistundi naku - as long as our kids know how to judge between a good person and a bad person and are cautious not to fall into bad company, treating neighbors/friends as own family is nothing wrong 

 

 

also - this might only be me, but most of my childhood friends are here in the US and the ones in India are super busy.. manam free unnappudu vallu free undaru and vallu free unnappudu manaku edho ramayanam untadi.. so its not like you can go out for a walk every evening or each morning with childhood friends and relax. 

 

These are my opinions. 

after kids life in USA shitty ga tayaraindi - what do you mean by that bro?

A) Before kids, ekkadikaina random ga vellochu, random ga tineyochu, you can meet friends, plan trips very randomly. With kids nuvvu baytaki vellali ante oka yagnam la untadi. Kids only give few windows of time for outdoor tarvata cranky aipotaru. Food for kids is also a challenge, vaallu food tinakapothe that day would look like a torture. A man will be house arrested after kids. At least for me . India lo aithe you get bit relief with other kids playing time, maids dorukutaru, Grand parents home ki poinapudu relief vastundi. India trip itself feels like a torture. Have to plan so many things and feels forced and restless for me.

 

No feel of belongingness -

A) Everyone has their own set of self belongingness definition. For me spiritual events, family functions, Brother and Sister gatherings for festivals, Parents ni kattesinattu kakunda freedom ga undela daggara unchukovatam. I belong to this society ane feel USA lo raledu. I dont care about Omerika politics or anything related Omerrika holidays. I only care about the paycheck I am getting here.

Oka pandaga ledu pabbam ledu - bro nuvvu India velthe hyd or chennai veltha antunnav. akkada kuda almost inthe undhi.

A) The flexibility of you can go to parents or in-laws or close family home in few hours is a blessing. Evening train ekkithe morning intlo untav. Ikkada pandaga anna feel, utsaham emi undav just forceful event la untadi. 

Pillala bdays, any other functions ki close friends tappa evaru undaru, cousins ni pilichina dooram ani raru- This is a blessing bro. less drama. close friends don't judge you. but relatives do. so cousins, relatives rakapovadam anedhi its a blessing in a disguise IMO.

A) Imagine kids barasala, first food feeding, first bday, first hair cut, Aksharabyasam, oonila function, lungila function, house warming, kids marriages etc etc so many small functions celebrating with your closest family vs friends. 

 

Your perspective is different from mine. My realization changed after kids drastically. Before kids I was so busy exploring and enjoying. Responsibilities vachaka you want families together. 

 

 

[Kurrodu1]

On 12/13/2022 at 9:58 AM, andhra_jp said:

 

nenu 2018 loo india(bangalore) ki return vachhesaa after 12yrs in UK...  I came back as there is no way i want to work during my 60s in IT and india meeda yenta leedanna koncham attachment vundi and also people seeking for early retirement india is heaven ...

I joined indian IT company in bangalore  and currently WFH from past 2 yrs..

I have 2 kids and currently in class 4 and class 6...   wife always respect my opinion so that route is always cleared..

india has advantages and disadvantages and  more or less everyone knows them...

advanatges of India which worked in our case -- availability of maids , ola/uber , instant home delivery of groceries, porter app to deliver goods anywhere , indian food everywhere , celebration of our festivals , crowds and lively atmosphere , family relatives nearby us , flexibility to choose early retirement which is tough in US/UK unless u earned big during 30s 40s.. ,  availability of good hospitals and quick appts...

so nuvve need to analyze your personal situation and do what suits u which can be either staying back or return to india..

naaku monthly roughly expenses --

normal CBSE school with fees -- 1Lakh per yer so monthly for 2 kids = 18k

Rent - 30k per month as its gated community

Groceries and eating out --  15k

electricity and gas -  2k

internet , OTT - 3k

Shopping for family -  5k - 10k

Travel -  5k-10k on average monthly as every month we dont go anywhere...

So total monthly roughly expenses for family of 4 --     80 - 85k

naaku 2 own flats vunnayi kabatti my rent is actually paid from the rents collected...

 

 

Thanks for this post bro. This is what I wanted to see. Breakdown items. . I can use this for my base expenses. 

[Kurrodu1]

On 12/13/2022 at 6:06 AM, CNR said:

My honest opinion is do not to go India. if you not fall under three categories 

1. Your parents have big business and need to take care of it. Four of my friends/relatives left because their parents have business,they are taking care of parents business and started their own . It took 2 years to settle but now happy.

2. You made lot of money( I mean in million dollar like consultancy owners 25 to 30 million  )in USA and want start business in India. 

3. You are super rich in India with 100 Cr of money and pasive income of 10 lakhs monthly. 

Remaining all who want to go back India for regular office job and live modest life. Just stay in USA. Middle class life in USA is luxury, I understand loneliness but get used to it.

I see pattern that any person want to go back India to do business never returned back, people who want to do regular job  most of them returned back

I heard this one too. Doorapu kondalu nunupu la, want to be careful not make stupid mistakes. Will see.

[Kurrodu1]

On 12/13/2022 at 11:25 AM, DJBravo said:

Bro you cannot sustain in India if you lived here for 12 years. I went back and stayed for 2 years and came back eventually. 
 

Hyd kante edayna manchi village lo undadam best inka IT jobs mana vala kadu. Lead  simple life oka manchi 1 acre polam teskoni farming chesko. Aa life style kinminthly 50k vachina saripotayi. Ikada tensions toh healh bisket cheskodam kana adey best.

me Illu jubilee hills or banjara hills ayte ok otherwise waste cuz it’s the most happening area

main reasons cheppu bro why returned.

Jubliee or Banjara how it make it much difference?

[Kurrodu1]

On 12/13/2022 at 6:06 AM, CNR said:

My honest opinion is do not to go India. if you not fall under three categories 

1. Your parents have big business and need to take care of it. Four of my friends/relatives left because their parents have business,they are taking care of parents business and started their own . It took 2 years to settle but now happy.

2. You made lot of money( I mean in million dollar like consultancy owners 25 to 30 million  )in USA and want start business in India. 

3. You are super rich in India with 100 Cr of money and pasive income of 10 lakhs monthly. 

Remaining all who want to go back India for regular office job and live modest life. Just stay in USA. Middle class life in USA is luxury, I understand loneliness but get used to it.

I see pattern that any person want to go back India to do business never returned back, people who want to do regular job  most of them returned back

Based on your comment I am far far away from moving to India. 

[Kurrodu1]

22 hours ago, jerry1 said:

Hyderabad is highly polluted, full of dust in air . tough to live for a month

Honestly I never observed pollution. How much our life get affected by it. 

Bachelors lo galiki thirigam. Peli time ki USA. apudapudu 1month trips. Does pollution is really that bad and can be a decision maker for moving to India?