Pellam torture

[cameraman]

Evvado FB lo esadu

 

Hello guys, need some serious advice. I am 30 years old and my wife is 28 years. I was on an F-1 student VISA and I got married to a desi US citizen (born, raised, studied, and worked in India but she got her US citizenship/naturalization through her parents who got it through work three decades ago/30 years ago). She never lived in the US but only came to the US after we got married. The proposal came through my parents. It was an arranged marriage. We are married for almost 2 years now. We have a 6-month-old daughter. I am on my 2-year conditional green card. I have to apply for a 10-year green card next year in June/July. Things are not working out between us. She is too dominating and harassing. She wants me to be at her fingertips. She fights with me every day one way or the other showing me down. She bad-mouths me to her parents and friends. She doesn't respect my parents and she taunts me while I talk to them over the phone. Living every day with this woman is a nightmare. I have gone through trauma and have regretted marrying her multiple times. I am filled with sorrow and grief. She has been mentally harassing me. She doesn't allow me to video call my parents in India and show them their granddaughter. My parents got their B1B2 visa approved but my wife is not allowing my parents to visit us and see their granddaughter for a few months. She wants to take control of everything and everyone. She exhibits the quality of Narcissistic Personality Disorder- NPD (google it). I am a software engineer and make a decent chunk thrice than her and she's from customer support (call center background) but she manages my finances. She gives me a budget of 100$ in debit cards for my expenses. I can't even use my own credit card. Before marriage, I used to send money to my parents for family support but after marriage when she took control of my savings and finances from then she prevented me to send my parents money in India. There is no financial freedom for me. She doesn't even allow me to do investments but stores our money in the credit union. Our sexual life was fine before our daughter was born and now after our daughter is born there is nothing. She has a fetish of being a master and she treats me like a slave on the bed. She even abused, insulted me about my body parts (d*ck size), body shamed me, and humiliated me several times when intimate. She says all these turn her on. I have had enough and have gone beyond the saturation point but still have remained calm in the interest of not destroying my family only for the sake of my 6-month-old daughter. Very hardly convinced her to have a couple of counseling sessions where obviously I couldn't express all these (much more) over the phone. No outcome out of counseling. There are nights when I have wept and have fallen asleep regretting suffering marrying her. Now that we have a daughter, my daughter is my love and my daughter is my life.

My questions

-------------

1. If I file for divorce who will get the custody of our daughter? Will my wife get it? Or will I get it? Or if we both fail then will my daughter go to foster home?

(As a newly become father who is very emotional and sensitive I can not live without my daughter. My daughter is my world to me and my bundle of joy. In my case, if my daughter goes to the foster home then I will forget all the abuses she does and will continue to bear those because I can not lose my daughter). I am scared to think of divorce if there is a slight chance that I would lose my daughter. So please help me out as to what to do. I am completely blank and suffering very badly.

2. If I file for divorce will my 10-year green card (GC) extension be rejected? (GC is the second thing to be after my daughter. I can't bear her torture. Even if my GC is rejected I can go to India and easily find a decent-paying coding job.)

3. Last year we got a home in our name jointly. I had invested all 4 years of my savings as a downpayment. The monthly mortgage is being debited from my checking account (my salary). She has not invested a single dollar in the house. I took complete responsibility for the home buying in both of our names jointly. There is a mortgage debt of 415,000$ at the rate of 6.38% interest on the house. If we get a divorce decree then what will happen to the home? How can we settle/divide the home dispute?

4. Can we live in the same home and file for divorce?

5. She has taken custody of my finances and bank accounts though we are joint owners. How can I have my hard earnings back?

6. Please help me out how I could come out of this trouble. Thanks

[LadiesTailor]

8 minutes ago, cameraman said:

Evvado FB lo esadu

 

Hello guys, need some serious advice. I am 30 years old and my wife is 28 years. I was on an F-1 student VISA and I got married to a desi US citizen (born, raised, studied, and worked in India but she got her US citizenship/naturalization through her parents who got it through work three decades ago/30 years ago). She never lived in the US but only came to the US after we got married. The proposal came through my parents. It was an arranged marriage. We are married for almost 2 years now. We have a 6-month-old daughter. I am on my 2-year conditional green card. I have to apply for a 10-year green card next year in June/July. Things are not working out between us. She is too dominating and harassing. She wants me to be at her fingertips. She fights with me every day one way or the other showing me down. She bad-mouths me to her parents and friends. She doesn't respect my parents and she taunts me while I talk to them over the phone. Living every day with this woman is a nightmare. I have gone through trauma and have regretted marrying her multiple times. I am filled with sorrow and grief. She has been mentally harassing me. She doesn't allow me to video call my parents in India and show them their granddaughter. My parents got their B1B2 visa approved but my wife is not allowing my parents to visit us and see their granddaughter for a few months. She wants to take control of everything and everyone. She exhibits the quality of Narcissistic Personality Disorder- NPD (google it). I am a software engineer and make a decent chunk thrice than her and she's from customer support (call center background) but she manages my finances. She gives me a budget of 100$ in debit cards for my expenses. I can't even use my own credit card. Before marriage, I used to send money to my parents for family support but after marriage when she took control of my savings and finances from then she prevented me to send my parents money in India. There is no financial freedom for me. She doesn't even allow me to do investments but stores our money in the credit union. Our sexual life was fine before our daughter was born and now after our daughter is born there is nothing. She has a fetish of being a master and she treats me like a slave on the bed. She even abused, insulted me about my body parts (d*ck size), body shamed me, and humiliated me several times when intimate. She says all these turn her on. I have had enough and have gone beyond the saturation point but still have remained calm in the interest of not destroying my family only for the sake of my 6-month-old daughter. Very hardly convinced her to have a couple of counseling sessions where obviously I couldn't express all these (much more) over the phone. No outcome out of counseling. There are nights when I have wept and have fallen asleep regretting suffering marrying her. Now that we have a daughter, my daughter is my love and my daughter is my life.

My questions

-------------

1. If I file for divorce who will get the custody of our daughter? Will my wife get it? Or will I get it? Or if we both fail then will my daughter go to foster home?

(As a newly become father who is very emotional and sensitive I can not live without my daughter. My daughter is my world to me and my bundle of joy. In my case, if my daughter goes to the foster home then I will forget all the abuses she does and will continue to bear those because I can not lose my daughter). I am scared to think of divorce if there is a slight chance that I would lose my daughter. So please help me out as to what to do. I am completely blank and suffering very badly.

2. If I file for divorce will my 10-year green card (GC) extension be rejected? (GC is the second thing to be after my daughter. I can't bear her torture. Even if my GC is rejected I can go to India and easily find a decent-paying coding job.)

3. Last year we got a home in our name jointly. I had invested all 4 years of my savings as a downpayment. The monthly mortgage is being debited from my checking account (my salary). She has not invested a single dollar in the house. I took complete responsibility for the home buying in both of our names jointly. There is a mortgage debt of 415,000$ at the rate of 6.38% interest on the house. If we get a divorce decree then what will happen to the home? How can we settle/divide the home dispute?

4. Can we live in the same home and file for divorce?

5. She has taken custody of my finances and bank accounts though we are joint owners. How can I have my hard earnings back?

6. Please help me out how I could come out of this trouble. Thanks

Wait for another six months and get a ten year GC and file for divorce… ameki edo disorder vundi annav kada… Aa reason tho you can take your daughter custody… lawyers will help…

[Aquaman]

Just now, LadiesTailor said:

Wait for another six months and get a ten year GC and file for divorce… ameki edo disorder vundi annav kada… Aa reason tho you can take your daughter custody… lawyers will help…

a six months  kuda undela ledhu ga lol

[Aquaman]

[JAMBALHOT_RAJA]

Why don’t take an appointment with divorce lawyer for professional advise 

[EyBisa]

vamboooo

[Sanjiv]

13 minutes ago, JAMBALHOT_RAJA said:

Why don’t take an appointment with divorce lawyer for professional advise 

Then he has to ask his controlling wife for money to pay lawyer fees. Bummer

[JAMBALHOT_RAJA]

1 minute ago, Sanjiv said:

Then he has to ask his controlling wife for money to pay lawyer fees. Bummer

Then he is in deeeeeep sheeeeeeeet

[Sanjiv]

Both parents have equal legal rights (unless it is proved that a parent is dangerous, unfit, etc. in which case they may be granted supervised visitation in the presence of a 3rd party).

At the divorce hearing, the judge will decide in the best interests of the child who will be the home parent and who will have visitation rights. With a good lawyer, the judgment can be finalized with shared parenting for one parent to be the home parent and the other parent can take the child for 3 days a week to his/her home. Usually since women can care for kids better, they become home parents and men become visiting parents.

Nothing to worry. Kid won't end up in foster home. You won't lose your GC.

So now, how will this reply reach the poster on FB?

[Aquaman]

arey pelli endhuku intha complicated 

okkasari enter ayyo set kakpothe

life barbadh la undhi

 

Set kakpothe anytime east to exit process undali without much financial burden. 

[Kakynada]

devarce thats it 

 

[PrivacyPolicy]

Bro. In life one time break is break, it will lead to keep on breaks in several areas. So dont begin your life journey towards failure.

 

It's very common in married life. But looks your situation is peak and on another level.

 

Try to have very candid discussion without mentioning divorce with her. Bcz it's unnecessary bad thought to your wife also.

 

If both of your candid discussion won't work at ALL. Then secretly reach out her parents to convenience her to cool down on you.

 

But don't work or think about divorce, take a break by visiting india with family for refresh. It's not good for you and daughter if you go divorce.

[Pahelwan2]

Chex lo matram upper hand anta. Idi chalu ametho slave laga undadaniki. 

[Assam_Bhayya]

Green card urike raadhu 

[cameraman]

1 hour ago, Pahelwan2 said:

Chex lo matram upper hand anta. Idi chalu ametho slave laga undadaniki. 

thu..respect leka, boothulatho enti andhi..