Parents - how to handle

[quest]

43 minutes ago, Thokkalee said:

What if she says she don’t want to meet them or see them anymore? There are many guys who don’t meet their parents anymore as they don’t get along with the wife.. na dosth okadu 10 years nunchi India poledu to avoid meeting his parents.. parents and wife didn’t talk for nearly 10 years now.. 

option a. divorce option b. leave everyone including parents and live alone

[Konebhar6]

1 hour ago, quest said:

baaga experienced unnattunnaru bro.. mee age? number of kids? 

Emundi bro. Andari illallo paristhithi idee. Kakapothe scenarios and examples different. It falls on you to strike a balance between wife and parents. Don't take sides. The respect your wife has for you will increase. Keep loving your parents, no matter what the situation is. 

 

[Konebhar6]

56 minutes ago, quest said:

option a. divorce option b. leave everyone including parents and live alone

@Thokkalee

Option C. Keep visiting his parents and if his wife does not want to visit or talk its her choice. Tell the same to parents.

[Thokkalee]

14 minutes ago, Konebhar6 said:

Emundi bro. Andari illallo paristhithi idee. Kakapothe scenarios and examples different. It falls on you to strike a balance between wife and parents. Don't take sides. The respect your wife has for you will increase. Keep loving your parents, no matter what the situation is. 

My experience is that it greatly depends on the wife’s personality and how the relationship was from the time you got married..

if they never got along properly, don’t expect it to happen now.. if they were fine initially and have issues now, then you can try to fix it.. 

[Konebhar6]

8 minutes ago, Thokkalee said:

My experience is that it greatly depends on the wife’s personality and how the relationship was from the time you got married..

if they never got along properly, don’t expect it to happen now.. if they were fine initially and have issues now, then you can try to fix it.. 

Agree. In my case, I am grateful for my wife to ignore things that she does not like at my home. My parents are nice and mature. They all get along well. Mostly I have seen everyone is nice, but misunderstandings. Indians have the worst communications between people as we do not express. We do not talk out issues. Getting anger and shouting are our solutions. Trying to make the other person agree to our point is the problem. We need to "Agree to disagree" more.

[quest]

36 minutes ago, Konebhar6 said:

@Thokkalee

Option C. Keep visiting his parents and if his wife does not want to visit or talk its her choice. Tell the same to parents.

I cannot tolerate this option bro.. mellaga kids ni mana side grand parents ki dooram chestaaru. musali tanam lo koduku leka, manavallu leka kshobha padi naligipotaaru

[quest]

24 minutes ago, Thokkalee said:

My experience is that it greatly depends on the wife’s personality and how the relationship was from the time you got married..

if they never got along properly, don’t expect it to happen now.. if they were fine initially and have issues now, then you can try to fix it.. 

wife is smart in my case. baaga manchiga act chesedi.. parents close ayyi anni khulla khulla cheppesaaru
ippudu valla weakness lu kanukkuni vallani naaku bad cheyyalani choostundi

[quest]

10 minutes ago, Konebhar6 said:

Agree. In my case, I am grateful for my wife to ignore things that she does not like at my home. My parents are nice and mature. They all get along well. Mostly I have seen everyone is nice, but misunderstandings. Indians have the worst communications between people as we do not express. We do not talk out issues. Getting anger and shouting are our solutions. Trying to make the other person agree to our point is the problem. We need to "Agree to disagree" more.

100% agree.. nachaledu ante chepparu, alage manasulo pettukuni naanchi naanchi mottam bharatham 3 nelala tarawata chaduvutaaru

 

ee mottam muchata lo.. maa amma nenu ye independent decision teesukunna, nee pellam neetho adinche aata, nuvvu yerripappa ayyav antundi

shocking reveal yendante.. nenu, naa wife and family are all good anukunna.. scene andarillalo same ani artham ayyindi

seriously, anni vidichipedadaam anukuntunna, may the lord of the relations bless me this wish

[Konebhar6]

4 minutes ago, quest said:

I cannot tolerate this option bro.. mellaga kids ni mana side grand parents ki dooram chestaaru. musali tanam lo koduku leka, manavallu leka kshobha padi naligipotaaru

U misunderstood. I am saying you should keep visiting your parents along with your kids. Nenu ranu ani natakalu cheste...vadili u go with kids...

[Konebhar6]

2 minutes ago, quest said:

100% agree.. nachaledu ante chepparu, alage manasulo pettukuni naanchi naanchi mottam bharatham 3 nelala tarawata chaduvutaaru

 

ee mottam muchata lo.. maa amma nenu ye independent decision teesukunna, nee pellam neetho adinche aata, nuvvu yerripappa ayyav antundi

shocking reveal yendante.. nenu, naa wife and family are all good anukunna.. scene andarillalo same ani artham ayyindi

seriously, anni vidichipedadaam anukuntunna, may the lord of the relations bless me this wish

Learn to respond in a way to shut others mouths. Your response for highlighted text should be

"Avnu nuvvu ala penchav nannu. Neede mistake. Evaru edi chepte adi nammesta and vallu cheppinatlee chesta. Chinnapati nundi meeru idee kada chusindi?. Ila matladi mimmalni meeru kinchaparuchukovaddu"

[Konebhar6]

6 minutes ago, quest said:

100% agree.. nachaledu ante chepparu, alage manasulo pettukuni naanchi naanchi mottam bharatham 3 nelala tarawata chaduvutaaru

 

ee mottam muchata lo.. maa amma nenu ye independent decision teesukunna, nee pellam neetho adinche aata, nuvvu yerripappa ayyav antundi

shocking reveal yendante.. nenu, naa wife and family are all good anukunna.. scene andarillalo same ani artham ayyindi

seriously, anni vidichipedadaam anukuntunna, may the lord of the relations bless me this wish

Bharinchevadinee bhartha antaru bro.

Veetikee sanyasam ante ela. Oka rendu peggulesi or beer .. remember the good moments you spent with your parents and with your family. Will give a good kickk..Or do an outing with all ... Or do something nice for your parents and wife .... Make them happy. People like surprises.

[psycopk]

nuvvu intlo ekuva sepu untunav.. if you dont have friends to hang out atleast couple of hours a day ... its better to move to hyd..

[quest]

1 hour ago, Konebhar6 said:

U misunderstood. I am saying you should keep visiting your parents along with your kids. Nenu ranu ani natakalu cheste...vadili u go with kids...

gotcha

[hotmaddy]

Intha type cheyyala anukunna. Thanks bro for posting.

Maa Nanna best but ee madya chiraaku peduthunnadu. Ekkada invest cheddam anna munduki ponivvadu. Asalu edaga nivvatledu.

Cheppakunda naaku nachinattu invest chesukundam anukuntunna. It will send a wrong message like separation but for better outcome ilanti small emotions ni pakkana pettali.

[pavanjagan]

On 8/22/2023 at 12:32 AM, quest said:

chinnappatinundi amma ante chala istam, naaku papa puttakamundu varaku undoubtedly ammantene chala chala istam.. papa puttaka, iddaru first anelaa undi..
nanna ante gouravam tappa vipareetamaina istam yemi ledu...

Chala years america lo undi, recent ga India ki vachanu, parents pedda vallu avutunnaru, america lo forever undalenemo ani chala years nundi plan chesi final ga vachaanu

naa personal mentality avtali vallani artham chesukovatam, valla kosam nenu adjust avvatam ilaa untundi general ga... so, India ki vachinappudalla, amma nanna ista prakasaram naduchukune vaanni, yevaina suggestions unte cheppevanni, vallu kaadu koodadu ante vallista prakarame adjust ayyevaanni.

memu oka manchi town lo untaam, direct america to hyd kaakunda oka 1 year ayina intlo undamani parents annaru, nenu kooda manchi idea ani alaane untunnam.

ippudu andaram kalisi okechota untunnam kadaa, abhipraya bedhalu vastunnayi. nenu yedaina chepte innallu maa maata vinnadu, ippudu vinatledu ani basha padutunnaru.. nenu adjust avudaam ante jeevitaantam adjust avutooone undaalemo ani bayam, konni konni pillala (naa kids) matters lo adjust avvalekunna..

andarilaagane maa amma the best ani anukunna.. she is smart, very intelligent, family kosam yento sacrifice chesindi. kaani amma lo kooda swardham (naa kutumbam ye baagundaali), dabbulekkuva karchu pettakoodadu, kodali ni kooturilaa kaakundaa different ga choodatam (not raachi rampaalu pettadam) ilaantivi tattukolekunna

nanna age perigi, konchem chadastam vachi, chinna chinna paruvu poye panulu chestunnaru, avi ammaki kooda nachatledu.

amma naaku financial advise lu istundi, alaa kaadu amma, naaku telusu yem cheyyalo ante, badha padutundi.

iddariki health kooda anthanthamaatrame, memu intlo undatam tho inkaa burden yekkuvayyindi, panulu avi chesukolekundaa unnam andaram kalisi because of kids...

manaki sthomata undi full time driver and extended hours pani manishini pettukundaam ante antha dabbulu kallaku kanapatledaa ani malli koppadataaru..

pillala chaduvulu, birthday lu, memu vesukune battalu, nagalu anni vallaki nachinatle jaragali ani adamant ga untunnaru. at least memu yedaina cheppina, meekem telusu ani consider cheyyatleru..

oka flow lo kakundaa bits and pieces lo raastunnaduku sorry, naa thoughts vache daanni batti raastunna...

anadaram kalisi hyd lo undaam anna, maaku kudaradu, maaku ikkada pellillu, events, chaavulu untaay annaru.. amma kalla noppulatho yekkadiki velladu, kaani nanna kalla noppulu unna, annitiki vellalanukuntaadu.. sare konni years vallu oorlone untaam ani karaakhandigaa cheppesaaru

Next year hyd vellandi, pillalni baga chadivinchukondi annaru.. ee ooka year undamannaru so that society lo kodalu naalugu rojulu kooda lekundaa vellipoindi ani anukokundaa

pillalaki phone ivvoddu ante istaaru. pillalaki yevaina kathalu cheppandi ante chepparu.. yeppudu samajam, valla godava, vella godava, aa ilaa chinna chinna issues

nenu maa thata dagagrinundi yento manchi nerchukunna, naa pillalu kooda alaa undaali ani korukunna, kodaratledu

only complaints raasaanu, chala manchi vishayalu kooda unnay.. iddariki naa kids ante istam, kid ki yemaina ayite talladillipotaaaru.. kodalu athagaaritlo dieting cheyyatam impossible but maa vallu aa freedom icharu.. maa andari kante munde tintundi, tanu dieting kabatti, memu migilina rice tintaam. andarilo maa pillalu, manavadu, manavaraalu great ga undaali anukuntaaru... etc ilaa yenno good things.

final ga naa badha yentante... nenu anukunnadaanikante maa parents kooda andari parents laagane swardham, pisinaritanam, chadastam etc
prati kshnam nannu inkaa chinna pilladilaa choostoo, naa decisions ki value ivvakapovadam nachatledu, pillalaki tablets iche vishayam lo kooda naa mata negganivvatledu... nenu sasemiraa tablets veyyanu ante rojanta gonagatam.. etc

ee 1 year kallumoosukuni koorchotamaa, 2-3 months lo hyd shift avvatamaa ani oka alochana

inkaa pedda samasya yentane, raanu raanu ee behaviour ni yelaa handle cheyyatam..

---- meelo yevarina face chesi, vallanu hurt cheyyakunda yedaina solution alochinchi implement chesi unte, please cheppagalaru/

few years lo anni problems potai